The Beauty of Tears!

As I sat there crying uncontrollably..It occurred to me what if people saw me? What if they think I’ve gone crazy? What if they judge me? What if they call me weak, overly sensitive? Too deep into shit? , Too used to giving crap to myself

Then the heart spoke to me. She said what if you are actually, finally going sane?. The tears bordered on a smile and finally maybe for the first time i felt safe, protected and held. To respond intensely and he-artfully to something, I must have actually have gone inwardly sane, IN-sane.

Finally being one with your pain and hurt and not running like so many do, building castles of their life, convenient escapes to not face what is really there in the guise of let’s not rock the boat, its not needed/required or be well guarded/ put together to prove their superiority to themselves.

The heart loses in all such games. A moment of innocent authenticity and vulnerability lets the Universe Live in us again.

The Universe doesn’t need more people with armors, well defined intelligence, spiritual brilliance. It needs people with a heart full of Love. A heart so loving and complete that it’ll walk into hell and back for the sake of love itself.

That and only that has ever made a redemptive difference!

Walking in the Wilderness

Walking in the wilderness
Lost.. but never truly lost
Found.. but not in a way that points to as an address..
No real company other than the sounds of the birds and the rustling of the leaves..
The quiet movement of the trees
Cracking of the stones and the warm summer heat..
Alone with and as everything in the universe
And yet the occasional joyful company of some beloved human beings
Crazy enough to hang out with me

The Deep wildness of Spirit
Engulfed in darkness
A darkness so pure that no light can touch it
Dark and yet never beyond holding
I don’t know where I come from
And where am headed
I just know this tiny container known as me
Is Held
In Love and Silence

The Dark Christmas!

Own the Hurt
Be one with it
No one can fuck with you then
It’s yours. You see?
It’s no longer something wrong, bad or something that you feel sorry about
The angst, powerlessness, the hurt, the misunderstanding, sadness, helplessness
Romance with it.
Breathe the heart of your presence to it.
It’s the spark of the stones that led to the fire
It’s the crucifixion that led to the resurrection.
It’s your inscrutable aloneness that they can’t take from you.
There’s an anvil on the horizon this Christmas
An anvil to break down all that which gets in the way of your True Being!
You can’t run from YOU anymore, try as you might..
FUCK IT!!
FACE IT!!
OWN IT!
It’s always been about you! Always.
It’s dark and quiet.
For this is the promise we made, before time and space
That we’ll walk the path of Truth and Love!
Long before the face of the universe came into Being.
You promised to walk beloved child of God!
You promised to walk
Don’t turn back on it now.
Even if your shadow doesn’t walk with you
Sigh!
Alright!! Rip me limb from limb, shred to shred
Lose everything that can be lost, throw it in the bin
Drink up the darkness
Leave nothing of me including my shadow.
On this Christmas plunged in darkness
I took the promise
Long before light made its way..
For the brightness of Millennia ahead of me.
When All is said and Done
This is all I will have
This promise to Truth and love!

The Path of Humility and Weakness

The Path of Humility and Weakness

The elders described the path as Revolutionary and rebellious
The ancestors said that it was a path to be tread cautiously & carefully.
The leaders said the path was filled with grit and gumption
The wise saints said the path was of detachement
However in your heart a song whispered,
A song none had heard before
Because it could only come to you, whose name it was made for.

Your heart said
The path is of humiliation and weakness
Of destruction and subtraction
Of simplicity and reduction

Because only when we are humiliated & weak
Do we really open
Till then we’re being incredibly smart with our lives
Spiritually, intellectually smart
Too sorted, too put together
Something has to break down all our smartness
For us to Break Free!

And only when we truly Open
Does Life Pour itself into Us
Fully, Merge into our Being!
And Leave a simplicity
And the Unknown Beaming!

You’ll fall in your own eyes,
You’ll fall in the worlds eyes,
The world will fall in your eyes
But my Love!
You’ll rise
you’ll Rise
In the Eyes of Love

And you’ll finally learn what it means to be Real, Caring and perhaps Honest!

The Warmth in your Heart!

Just pause, maybe even for a second and feel the warmth in your heart.

A warmth that belongs to All Life! Some call it gratitude,some compassion, Heart, etc.

That’s the most beautiful thing about Wisdom, Beauty, Truth and Love is that it doesn’t belong to any one of us.It’s always from and for the bounty of Life

At the Feet of this Mystery, as it reveals itself deeper and deeper, I find Love at its very core, I find myself utterly human, my very real insecurities, my constant battles, the ever present tension of the world and helplessly so. There is a strength in that, in holding it all together and surrendering. An exquisite tenderness and freshness, moist eyes and hands grounded, as hard as iron.

The sooner we acknowledge that we’re failures at this thing called life,The easier Grace can take over, And take over it will.

When things seem rough, and the absurdities of life seem to take control. When All else fails..

Go to your heart. In genuine surrender. Just, Pause, maybe even for a second and feel the warmth of your heart.

That’ll do.

An address From and For the Vagabond

An address From and For the Vagabond

Am looking for the one without an address
I keep searching, I keep asking around
No one seems to know where the friend is tonight
Although he did give me his sign and this road-map and asked me to find his whereabouts
Yet, in just the way he said it
I knew that in actuality he didn’t really want me to find him,

You see,he never had an address.
He wanted me to Just BE where I am and Meet him there.
He was Always Right here, Ready to meet and Lavish love!

And yet as is the way with Lovers, we chase
So I set out,
Traveling with an open hood
The breeze flowing through me, in me
The vast mountains, the open road
The one without an address, without coordinates beckoned

At long last, At the 100th Dawn i gave up
As the night fell and the next morning rose
I Settled everywhere, finding home in everything and everyone
Losing and building my world afresh with each breath.

I never did find him
But he did, He Found Me!
He always does!

We’re Winning my Friend! Do you See?

We’re winning my friend. Do you See?

Giving into the Heart is the greatest thing we can do my companion.

Surrendering into the Unknown.
We end up touching the lives of people we may never meet.
Faces we may never see, voices we may never hear,
Are blessed!
It’s the greatest victory!

Yes you’re imperfect, so am i. Yes we fail, yes! we fall short, Yes! we ache tirelessly.. Can we still offer ourselves the resoluteness of tremendous kindness? Your life demands it of you!

Because seeing one instant from the Heart of Beauty renders it all Whole!, beyond repair.

No matter where you are, whatever you’re doing, however you are. We’re winning my friend, Do you see ? Rejoice my companion, Rejoice! We’re winning my friend. Do you See?

The East Wind

The East Wind

The east wind blew upon me!

Its breeze gentle yet firm.

The East wind blew,

And it took away everything with it

It stole everything from me

I was left penniless, opinion less, defenceless

And,

It left me however, with a freedom and quietness

A freedom so Vast and wide that nothing could ever contain it

A freedom so few desired

Quietness so tranquil

Quietness in total equanimity with all that is

Quietness everyone rebelled against

Standing there,

It was as if I was born again

It took everything with it

And left me Here, at peace

The East wind still blew about

Now, no longer so dangerous

The East Wind is all the Grace we need!

At the Heart of the Unknown

At the Heart of the Unknown
An open loving adventure our life is,

At the Heart of the Unknown
I lit a fire I cannot douse
Diving into the cool, calm depth of Being
I found Eternal Life.

At the Heart of the Unknown
I found a Freedom i knew nothing about.

At the Heart of the Unknown
Where all things go to die
I found My own Infinite Safety
I told my heart when am with you am safe,
It responded, So am I.

A new Born Baby

To learn to live like a new born baby is maybe the greatest challenge we as human beings will ever encounter. To hold the fact of existence with absolute love, like your looking at it for the first time, there’s an innocence and a freshness in that which we all have inside of us.

A joy without outcomes, an intimacy with feelings of fear, abandonment, rejection, destruction which isn’t based on running away or shunning them away. A life without calculations, a heart fully present, eager to learn without distinction and boundary.

To give yourself to the craft of the moment, to the craft of YOU!.. each moment. Where every road leads to life and learning. Where celebrations, quietness, play and creativity are paramount and second nature.

A baby.. that is enveloped and cradled in the warmth of Life! Even as it pours outside the window, We’re Safe!