This isn’t a post written from blame or anger but more reflection and expression. Also, its written in the first person but is more a rendition of our culture and times and my hope is most of us can relate to this. It is a bit long 🙂
From the time i was young i remember at so many places i was made wrong for being whoever i was and had to force myself into a certain system or template.. If i hadn’t studied enough i was good for nothing, so i forced myself to sit through atrocious schedules,classes to feel a sense of normancy. In fact it was the times of respite from class and everything that felt most normal, but we’re taught to ignore that, which doesn’t give us anything back, so i went to such terrible lengths to fit in. So much of life growing up was this everything had to fit into one mold else you were toast. Through school i was bullied threatened, labeled for being overtly sensitive and emotional, primarily because i had a comfort with the opposite sex. So i grew up being very apologetic and thought this was how i was supposed to function in the world and even I began indulging in such kind of behavior losing a true kind of innocence. Don’t get me wrong i did this for a while too so am not finding fault with it.
It was only when i started maturing, i realized what a great strength it actually is to be sensitive and heartful in a world such as this and stopped apologizing for it. In fact all the stuff i was made wrong for turned out to be my biggest strengths in a more deeper spiritual sesne. Not just that.. I began to realize there’s something tremendously off and not right about the systems we’re living in. So much comparison, judgement, anger and typecasting, There’s no deeper sense to them,they are burning people out, not designed to let a man live in true freedom and peace. And how many things the world has gotten wrong, primarily because they were not built from the place of deeper essence inquiry, love and patience .. I’ve observed this same kind of behavior pretty much everywhere in all domains of life. At work spaces,families, friend circles, pretty much anywhere where there were a gathering of people.
Our culture and society does not know how to let a human being flower, we are all interested in the mechanization of man.Turn him into a machine and drive it crazy till you exhaust the living hell out of it. Flowering on the other hand as we may have noticed in nature is such a patient and loving process.
There’s no particular reason am writing this, other than to maybe just remind someone who needs this.. old or young, just cause your life doesn’t fit into how the world has defined things to be, doesn’t mean you’re wrong or somethings not right about you. The world does not know how to live,in fact its a terrible example on living.. We’re constantly looking to it, it cannot show you how..Only your heart can. The depth of your own being. That comes from love and not the egoic separate functioning we are so used to.
And this is not out of angst, in fact i feel the the deepest love for the world and for my life just as it has been and yet the heart expresses for we must all learn to sit in front of the majesty and immensity of life in silence, and not knowing.So this is me doing that..
So those of you who have taken this dive in every aspect of your life and are attempting to live a truthful,heartful life wherever you are and however you are, let me remind you, you’re the crazy diamond we need and, you’re doing something immense and if i could bow at your feet right now, i would.